We used to have a lot of things or people that we don’t like.
When we just started working, we hated the colleague who does not work hard, but always take credit for the team efforts, but the manager like him a lot, looking at his flattering appearance, really make people frustrated.
Everyone should not overestimate our own moral standards, as well as the weak struggle against inertia.
source
Why would we be so repulsive what we didn't like in the past?
What people hate, some is because of the damage they bring to others for own benefits. Their inability to change the bad situation, or about what they want but can’t get.
Such as poverty, selfish behavior, other people being mean, others' indifference and so on.
We always say that all relationships are a mirror, through the mirror, you will know who you really are.
The part that a person cannot tolerate, in fact, is his/her part that he/she cannot tolerate, which is a projection.
Otherwise, the behavior of others is completely unable to arouse our inner waves, and we won’t feel his behavior annoying.
Projection effect refers to the phenomenon that individuals transfer their characteristics to others according to their needs and the subjective direction of their emotions.
For example, a selfish person, hate others to be selfish; a bad-tempered person, think that others are nagging him purposely make him angry; for a person who wants to take a shortcut, the most concerned thing for him/her is others are not aboveboard.
Before we look at ourselves, we tend to be overly judgmental about our moral level and think we will always draw the boundaries of the people we despise, but in fact, when we are in the other's position, we may have the same behavior.
source
Burma has a legend story: There is a dragon, every year, the village need to sacrifice a virgin, every year this village will have a young hero to fight the dragon, but no one survived. When another hero set out, someone followed him quietly.
The dragon cave paved with gold and silver, when the hero killed the dragon, and then sat on the corpse, looking at the flashing jewels, he slowly grows scales, tails and tentacles, eventually become evil dragons.
Human nature lacks of restraint to own morals behavior and lacks of self-discipline.
Many people when facing unfair treatment, the first instinct is to fight back, never thought to let it go.
In the workplace, facing people and things that we hate, the first reaction is to despise, and did not think of why we will become a member of them;
Life is too short to waste time and energy in hating others and confronting yourself. The more you getting angry, unconsciously you will become an irritable person, sensitive, and emotional easily out of control.
People allow themselves to indulge in a negative, boring state, after a long time, will slowly lose morale, self-paralysis.
The greatest significance of our efforts is to broaden our horizons by allowing ourselves to be able to jump out of the circle we hated.
source
According to Maslow's theory of demand, when basic needs are met, people will want to go for a higher levels of demand, when the higher level of demand is not met, people will be in a depression state, long-term depression may cause people to lose their passion for life, just like a zombie, or be living in narcissism.
In short, this is actually their ability doesn't match their ambitions.
This is the reason why so many people dislike their own circle, but can't jump out.
It is better to improve yourself than to fight with others.
Go and try something new.
There are more and more slashes of youth.
Instead of satisfying the boring lifestyle of "single-minded occupation," they began to choose a pluralistic life that could have multiple careers and multiple identities.
It is believed that a person who can switch careers freely will be able to expand to other fields by focusing on the industry.
Does a person have the ability to switch careers freely, will complain that colleagues are annoying and that the circle is too small?
We all have ambition, just that we are too lazy.
We value the temptation in front of us, but it is hard to work hard for the potential future.
Of course, we know that if we work hard, our life will be better, but it is too confrontational, and the reality of frustration also causes us to fall into the vortex of inertia.
So it is difficult to resist inertia, we in the environment of warm water, finally became the only cooked frog.
What can you do?
If you feel pain, you need to change.
If there is no self-control and life planning, people are easy to confine to the small things in front of, complaining, sinking to pass the time, to later, finally became someone annoying that you hated in the past.
