Eddie asked Feizal what he thought of the story Ordinx is relating and he commented, “In a small way it is disappointing. It is as if he is talking of some tribe of humans with strange customs. I had thought that the story being written by an alien, about a race who are aliens to her, we would find we cannot understand the story or their motivations. It is not so.”
1301
Sam asked, “Do you feel the same way about the aliens Solomon spoke of?”
John nodded. “They are indeed strange, but then I think there are many humans from our world who have even odder ideas.”
Candy primly explained to both John and Feizal about my dislike of our using the word humans for describing ourselves. “When we use the term, it is as if we are saying that those who are not human are lesser in some way to us. Robert has asked us to call all sentient beings human.”
Feizal apologised to Candy, without being condescending, speaking to her as he would to an adult. He then spoke so as to include all his men and family. “I find the idea of calling all sentients humans a commendable idea, showing that we are not like the European explorers of a few hundred years ago who thought all other races are subhuman.”
I grinned. “You are forgetting something just as important. As or when the world learns about us, they will call themselves humans and us mutants - which will suggest to them that we are something lesser than them; probably that we are a mistake by evolution.”
Feizal’s father spoke softly to him and Feizal laughed. “My father says you are indeed wise to call all intelligent species humans - you are a man who thinks of the future for his people.” I knew it was well-intentioned, so I did not object.
All I did say is, “We are going to face conditions nobody has faced before, so there are bound to be many mistakes. I hope everyone accepts that we are doing the best we can and forgive the mistakes. Feizal, if we are to talk about being impressed, then I think that Eddie and all the Cherinians have more cause to be impressed by what you have achieved.”
Feizal looked slightly puzzled and then smiled. “You mean by the success of John in sensitising minds to the powers of psychics?”
“No - admirable though it is, I’m more impressed by the fact that you have gathered normal humans, allowed them to learn of us and our powers and managed to keep their loyalty. May I ask them a question or two?” He gave me permission. “I am not addressing my question to the original three. Gentlemen, when you were told about the existence of men with unnatural powers and asked to allow John to train you so that you can sense them and warn Feizal, I can understand you agreeing. What I would like to know is, how did you feel when you were trained and you realised that John and Feizal were both men of such powers? Did it frighten you?”
They conferred among themselves and I guessed they had to choose someone willing to dare speak the truth. Feizal must have come to the same conclusion, for he asked them to speak openly, even if they felt it might upset him.
Most of the men were dressed in traditional burnouse, but the man who spoke was dressed in a casual (but very expensive) western style. After his salutations, he told us. “My name is Majid. I have studied at the University of Beirut, so I think I understand the question in a broader sense than my compatriots. If I have understood you correctly, I think your question has two levels - how do we, as normal people without your powers, feel about your people and especially our…Feizal and, how do we feel about it as Arabs? For instance, perhaps you are wondering whether our traditions affect our thinking? Are we loyal because of our traditions?”
I nodded. “You are right, though I was not expecting an answer so deeply analysed. Please go ahead as I have a feeling your answers and maybe the questions they provoke will open us to new ways of looking at our problems.”
“May I preface my reply with a point most non-Arabs will not know? The Bedouin travel and trade over vast areas, most of it desert - and in some parts of it, the desert is so dry that it is as if it is a desert of the desert. There are very few features that remain constant from one trip to the next, for the dunes constantly move like waves across the face of the desert. How is it then that there are such a few deaths? The major scientific part is knowing how to read direction from the sun and stars, but alone, it would not explain how a caravan can travel hundreds of miles across the desert and arrive at the precise location of an oasis. Then there is instinct. Many of our people have what westerners would call an uncanny sense of direction. Such a gift comes from generations of need for such an ability becoming dependable. However, now and then a man appears who has something beyond what can be named a sense of direction. Such gifts are not as awe inspiring as teleportation, but they save lives and are seen by our people as a blessing by Allah on that man and the caravan he is a part of.
1302
When we first began to become sensitive to powers in others, John Smithson made certain we only sensed him. His intentions were honourable, but they nearly caused a mistake that would have cost us our honour. Luckily the first three had agonised over the same worries and fears and they called us to a meeting and divulged all they knew and then discussed the conclusions they reached. I was not the only one who was shaken and felt the world had gone crazy. If the mind is given the time needed to think its way through the emotions, it then starts to recall certain truths and slowly it is able to accommodate the new information, sometimes creating a new image of the world that it can live with.
A few of us come from families who have owed their allegiance to the grandfather of Feizal, to his father and now us, to Feizal himself and any sons he has. Each generation has been proud to serve them, for each generation their family has been ruled by capable, fair and honourable men. For instance, if he had shown he only cares about us and our families, it would have earned him our loyalty. To see him quietly help others who do not owe him their fealty, sometimes helping provide medical assistance or pay for university fees for families of men who have been hostile to him, without his asking anything in return from them, these acts have shown us that what he does for us is not just for our loyalty and we treasure even more the relationship between his family and ours, between Feizal himself and us. As for those whose families had little contact with that of Feizal, they too have grown to care for him and their loyalty is strong - just as the hearts of these men are.”
I wanted it said clearly. “Majid, at first you intended killing John, because you saw him as an abomination - or was it because you feared his difference?”
Majid frowned and then admitted, “I had not realised, it was both.” There was a muttering among the other men and I sensed they felt the same way.
I shook my head, “Okay, I can, maybe, understand why your attitude would change with respect to Feizal…and even John. Why would you be willing to sacrifice yourselves for my family and for me? You sensed how strong Cherine is, didn’t it frighten you?”
“If we had not faced war with the organisation, we would have thought in different ways and perhaps not all of us would have been willing to help. Learning of evil men with powers, it served to make it clear for us that as with normal people, some are bad and some are good. By the time we started helping you, we were desperate to help Feizal grow his number of allies, for once they had placed the trigger in his mind, we felt we were losing the war and were failing him.” He looked at Feizal as he told me, “Feizal would meet with us as often as he could, even from the first days, talking to us openly about the dangers. He answered our questions so often that what had sounded magical became almost ordinary.”
I was very tempted to ask them the most important to me question, (I wanted to invite them to become Cherinians), but without understanding why, I felt it is not the right time. I prefer to go with my gut feel at such times, so I asked Ordinx to continue with his tale.
“As I’ve overheard from certain comments among yourselves, there is a certain lack of understanding when I quote Geeta, saying they had not identified sexual differences between the individuals of the Teacher and Happy species. By the time our species departed for returning to our planet, the question had been answered in detail, but I thought that since Geeta wrote in the manner of her current knowledge as the story unfolds, I should report it in the same manner. Time lived in each stage is mentioned in number of days, but the days are more than twice as long as Terran days are and years are shorter, about one hundred and sixty days. The tilt of the planet is much smaller and therefore the seasons only have small variations - mainly to do with the amount of rainfall. The strongest climate variations are caused by the elliptical orbit, with the temperature rising and falling at the times they are closest and furthest from their sun.
There may also be other awkward problems or differences which do not sound logical to many of you. Please keep in mind that even the way Terrans think is not uniform; in other lands their people have their own customs and some of them seem to be very strange to you. Imagine then just how different peoples from different planets and solar systems can be. They did not come into existence in the same manner as your species did, nor did they face exactly the same dangers, so their instincts are bound to vary - just as I know that those of my people do…and those of the Sparklers are unbelievably different from every species I have ever heard of.
1303
If you wish to try an easy formula for creating a different species with very strange ways of seeing the universe, just imagine a solar system with advanced lifeforms, but, they are situated far deeper within our galaxy and the stars are so many and so bright that they can be seen even during the daytime. As you have stories about your moon and the milky way, so will they have their own stories. Try and make up such a story for your own amusement and you’ll be forced to understand just how the differences accumulate - even some that do not make sense. Imagine you live in small towns and villages, that there are no large cities, as it was on Earth until the last thousand years. How important would names be? Would a description of the individual be of greater use, such as, a man who works metal, a smithy, and he has a son, would the son be known as Smithson?” There were a few titters, even from my loves, as John pulled a face.
“Our scientists have questioned how it is possible, but the people of Teacher, over all the inhabited parts of their planet, speak the same language, with only very minor variations. This can only be possible if they, as a species, do not like making up new words. The species of Teacher never saw a need for a species name, after all, they think of themselves as the equivalent of human. Their sun does not have a name, it is just the sun. Their two moons are called brightface and the skyparasite. Their equivalent name for stars is the twinkles. In other words, their language did not evolve beyond the descriptive.
My people are named the Anadir, and yet if translated, it just means the same as you mean when you call yourselves Mankind. The name of the Teacher species, if not translated, would be difficult for my species and yours to pronounce, so I offer a simplified version of their word - we will speak of them as being the To-woow-wiho.
Let’s return to the subject of personal names for the To-woow-wiho. Teacher is named Teacher by Geeta, but there is a name used by others who know Teacher. It is what you, well, Robert, would call a pet name. In other words, it is a descriptive name used by those who love Teacher. Fawaya - and it means, crooked legs. It is a name of endearment and must not be thought of as an insult.
There is no recorded instance, in our Anadir books, of one To-woow-wiho using an insulting word against another. They do fight, but if they want to say something bad about you, it will have to do with your traits; for instance, that you are dishonest, or greedy…and so on. Despite what I just said, I admit to a preference for the name provided by Geeta - Teacher.
Okay…the matter of sex. For most of the story, Teacher is mainly a male, but when he is a Tirrta, and only for that stage, he is more female than male. It is true for the entire range of species, they do not have females who are only female. It is joked among my people that the To-woow-wiho are the only species who are safe from Robert, should he ever visit them…”
Ordinx was forced to pause because of my loves, at first, then all Cherinians…and then all the locals, laughing so loudly. Since I was grinning back at him, he was free to enjoy the success of his sally and I bet all the Anadir Worlds will be filled with laughter tonight. I can see that Solomon will also report the joke and I wonder how much it will mean to the Sparklers. A thought just occurred to me - this is the first time I’ve been the butt of a joke about my loving females and it was funny without making any specific reference to my preference for the young ones.
“Female Anadir do not tend to tear at their souls, but us males sometimes do, especially those dedicated to the arts - and in particular, our poets. Perhaps having to deal with the male Anadir in an understanding way helped Geeta through those years with Teacher. I shall continue quoting her:
I can be sympathetic to a person’s suffering, especially when due to the loss of a loved one after previous distressing experiences, but what I find difficult to endure are the swings in mood. Just when I think Teacher has recovered and is on the mend, something will happen to remind Teacher of the death of Happy and I will have to share many hours of dark bitter thoughts and pain. I’ll never do this kind of sharing again, unless I also can communicate my feelings to the host. It is strange that not once have I objected to being kidnapped this way - I guess it is because if I had been asked, I would have been delighted and when things become bad, instead of being able to blame Teacher, I would have to blame myself - and as my husband would say, that is not part of any bargain I would sign.
Perhaps Teacher cannot sense the tiny changes, but I now can. Each time, the swings down into despair and pain are less steep and not as acute as the previous ones and I can hope there will be an end to them one day.
Teacher really hates confrontations! A family arrived at the farm and Teacher was told by them that he must leave, that the farm must be run by a family, not by one individual producing only enough food for himself. They made it sound like Teacher has been very selfish. Teacher was ready to give in without an argument, but luckily the neighbouring farmers had seen the strangers arrive, guessed what they planned and came to support Teacher. They got rid of the strangers, despite their threats, but when most of them returned to their own farms, a couple of farmer families stayed behind to talk with Teacher.
Teacher told them, ‘They were right, I cannot run the farm on my own.’
‘I agree,’ the spokesperson for the one family said, ‘but they should have talked with you in a civilised manner and asked to share with you - not try to run you off the farm. Would you find such an idea acceptable if the family are nice people and they respect your right to the part of the farm you are able to work?’
‘What about the house?’ Teacher desperately wanted to explain that he is keeping the house for Happy to return to, but knew such a claim would sound insane.
‘One person does not need such a large house, a smaller one can be built for you.’
1304
I was just in time to protect myself - the little I could do, for Teacher interpreted the offer as another rejection, that even the place belonging to Happy is to be taken and given to a family. This was when I realised a change has occurred in Teacher, something I suspect is unique to their species. The word and symbolic meaning of family no longer have the same connotation for Teacher. The relationship (friendship) with Happy is the ideal Teacher craves. Family is just a group of people who will reject you even after they call you to them. The farmers saw the grief and because it did not make sense to them, they did not think to help Teacher by explaining, or even by physically holding back Teacher. Perhaps if they had known where Teacher was going...
Since there was no conversation and the mind of Teacher was only thinking jumbled thoughts which made little sense to me, I concentrated on my own thoughts and tried to understand what is happening and where we are going. Once we had passed the last farm and upon entering the wild country, Teacher always took the direction which looked driest. With a hint or two from some broken thoughts, I realised Teacher is hoping to find the animals which attacked the family of Happy. The intention and false reasoning was clear - Teacher wants to be killed by the same animals, in the hope death will take his soul to Happy. I think the lack of reason in the thinking of Teacher has driven me into an insanity of my own! I cannot believe what I am sharing from Teacher.
Somehow Teacher continued walking long after all reserves were exhausted. Water there was, but nothing that could be eaten without causing further loss of strength. I became so involved that it became as if the desperate plight Teacher experienced was mine also. I felt our legs give way a number of times and once, when we fell and lay with face in the dust, I thought the end had arrived and did all I could to separate and enclose myself within my own thoughts only. When I awoke to what is happening once more, I realised we are on our feet and stumbling forward.
Suddenly my mind cleared as I realised the truth. Teacher could not have come to me within a future existence if Teacher is not to survive. In a way the thought was a comfort, but I was then left with the question - was Teacher sane at the time I was taken? Was I wanted as witness or is there an ulterior motive?
Suddenly all theories were forgotten and the chill of fear froze my mind. Teacher had entered the home-ground of the Adrafert. There must have been about twenty of the beasts surrounding us and all stood with head lowered, so as to stare at us through their upper (hunting) eyes. Teacher only paused for a moment and then, as if arriving among family, Teacher sat within their inner circle.
The fact that it was the largest, most brutal looking of the Adrafert which approached, its head held high as it delivered to Teacher a hunk of flesh, must have been a message to the rest of the pack. Teacher rolled it in the dust and then licked the meat. Satisfied, Teacher crouched to eat, choosing to eat as a beast, not as a human.
Over four hundred days went by and then Teacher woke one morning to find the pack gone. Without wasting even a thought on them, as if a switch had been tripped, Teacher immediately left the feeding area and retracing the path previously taken, flooded me with an urgent need to arrive within the town. I did not sense that Teacher understood the reason for the urgency.
At first I thought that the belligerent images in the mind of Teacher came from trying to be like an Adrafert, but as we entered the town I realised everyone was avoiding us, which meant they all identified the rage but were not alarmed, just not wanting to get involved. Once we were in a busy area, the legs of Teacher folded so that we seemed to be sitting in the middle of a road. We were surrounded and a net was thrown over us. I still could not understand what was happening, until one of those containing us told another that it looks like this is going to be a bad change from Nanni to Refose, third stage, and they better tie our limbs.
I sensed that Teacher lost consciousness, but I remained aware of some of the stimuli, without sensing recognisable mental reactions. I felt it when one of the limbs broke free of the restraints and thrashed around. Bones repeatedly snapped and I screamed from the pain until I lost awareness. By the time I woke up, Teacher had finished changing and the doctors had amputated the right front limb. From what they told Teacher, the bones had been crushed in too many places for them to re-set them, so they were forced to amputate. The forward limbs are used for walking, but are also the equivalent of our arms and hands, so Teacher is handicapped both with regard to walking and in ability to manipulate things.
I herewith make my recommendations to all future researchers who are thinking of using the Teacher technique for learning how the mind works - don’t! It is important that researchers remain unbiased if they are to study their subject effectively, whereas sharing smudges the line between researcher and subject, so that they become one too often for any researcher to remain unbiased. For instance, as an independent monitor, I would have stated that Teacher is weak and most of the harm is self-inflicted, but having been Teacher to an extent, I find it difficult to make such a judgement and can’t help feeling it is as if fate has decided to test the limits of endurance Teacher can bear without totally breaking. In this regards I find Teacher seems to have developed unique coping mechanisms, the mind breaking down so as to give itself time to heal without the world being able to interfere for a while. I cannot believe this is a species-wide defence mechanism.
Teacher is now a Refose, and as a male of his species, is thus slightly more compatible to my own personality - a slight amendment, it should be so, but in so many ways Teacher differs and confounds me.
A room is provided and food is brought each day, for Teacher cannot walk easily or work. Teacher feels uncomfortable about being a recipient of charity and when someone delivered the food and was asked about the person providing the food, the person, a Nanni, seemed surprised. Teacher was asked a few questions so that it is understood just how much Teacher knows about the way things work and then, after folding four beautiful, slim legs, the Nanni taught Teacher, with a voice warm with interest, as if discovering new truths as the Nanni taught us.
‘The town governing council is not authorised to provide for those who cannot provide for themselves, whether temporarily or permanently. However, they are permitted to assist anyone who chooses to provide the help needed. To keep matters simple, the council defines exactly what are the causes and needs and then the public, those families living in proximity to the family of person in need, are asked to submit an offer to help, quoting whatever amount it is they are likely to be short of - or to put it in another way, they must submit what subsidy they will need. The amount of the subsidy is not supposed to exceed one third of the total cost, but nobody bothers to check. Whoever asks for the smallest subsidy is the one winning the right to provide the help needed. Since the standing of the family who provide for others is raised, usually the subsidy requested is between zero and five percent of the total cost.’ The head of the Nanni dipped. ‘Such a family considers itself in your debt and is grateful for being allowed to ease your life.’
1305
Bitterly Teacher thought, ‘Honoured indeed! If they did it for me, if they cared, they would have visited. They want their support of me to be impersonal and employ this sweet Nanni so as to keep their distance - and I am supposed to be grateful?’
Teacher asked, ‘Sweet one, if I ask for a favour which would cost you time and effort, would you feel I am imposing? Would you then want to avoid me?’
‘ I would be pleased to help.’
‘Please be honest with me, for I admit that your presence, your beauty, gentleness and kindness, are valued more than these dishes of food you bring me. I would rather do without your help than lose the bright moment of my days.’ Even I could see the Nanni was embarrassed, so Teacher explained, ‘When I was a Nanni and had a friend, I was forced to study by my friend and I soon learnt to enjoy learning. I wish to petition the council for help so that I can learn instead of spending my days doing nothing.’
The council arranged for a tutor and Teacher soon had a library of books for studying all the subjects Teacher was interested in. I followed the lessons with great interest and I soon felt that I have been more than rewarded for all the difficult times. Doubly a treasure for my people is that my AI recorded everything. Since we have been given copies of their books, why was this so valuable? Because we, Teacher and I, also had a number of tutors to teach and explain for us. We also benefited in other ways, thanks to Teacher, but I’ll mention them later.
At first, Nanni would only stay until Teacher has eaten and can return the pots and dishes, washed of course. Then the family of Nanni bought dishes for Teacher, so that our Nanni helper would not have to carry dishes to and fro each day. Nanni, who Teacher named sweetness of beauty, which in their language can be spoken as one word, Liahita, did not use this as an excuse to leave earlier, instead spending time talking with Teacher, openly curious about him. Teacher spoke of how his life differed from that of others and it left Liahita shattered.
One day, after their talk, Liahita asked, “Honoured one, my family ask permission to visit.’
‘They are angry with me for keeping you from them for so long each day?’
‘No, they speak of sensing changes in me and my interest in learning pleases them and they feel they should meet the one who has been so good to me.’
Teacher managed to remain friendly and polite, but once the family departed, Teacher curled into a ball and quietly fell apart, weeping even when the tutor arrived. The tutor was distressed and not knowing how to help, wanted to call others who may know how to be of help to Teacher. Teacher asked the tutor to stay, and once in control again, told him, ‘I am not used to finding kindness, it tears at me. My weeping was not a bad thing - would you like to know of my life so that you understand what I mean, or would I be imposing?’
The tutor wanted to learn and unlike our lovely Liahita, asked many questions. When Teacher ended, they both remained silent for a time.
‘Happy was not your only friend Fawaya. Starting from the family who rejected you, they have never found happiness, for the guilt of what they did to you robs their lives of beauty. To this day they cannot face you without shame turning their love for each other to ashes. No one else has known the full story, so though we all wished to help them and you, we did not know how.
The family who tried to chase you off the farm, they were selfish fools - but the world has people like them, not all can be equally good. However, your neighbours, the other farmers who came to protect you, you did not realise they came as friends? You see, although you speak of how Happy helped you, it seems you do not appreciate what a difference you made to the life of Happy. Happy is the name you gave your friend, but until then, a more suitable name would have been Misery or Grief. The joy you showed at having Happy as your friend helped sweeten the time Happy would have to wait until meeting the family again and Happy has told all who communicate with the Cuinneara to mention to you that they all wait for you with love.’ The tutor sighed. ‘As you know, the Ghofens tend to lack patience with us who are younger, so after trying to communicate with you a time or two, to pass on the message, they stopped trying. What of your friend, the Nanni you named Liahita? Have you not won that sweet heart? It is why the family wanted to meet you, for when a person of a family grows to love another, the entire family is emotionally affected - you did not know? My friend, you are loved by many and it is only you who has been blind to the love offered.’
The tutor told the story of Fawaya, but wisely saw to it that only one or two visitors a day called on Teacher, reserving the rest of the time for other scholars and tutors who would enjoy spending time debating their understanding and beliefs of science, history, literature, ethics and philosophy. Over the hundreds of days that Teacher remained a Refose, the group of people who came to spend hours each day debating became known as the wise ones and some of what they said was quoted and affected the general way of life.
Teacher lasted as a Refose for a longer than usual time, about one thousand one hundred days, about 6.8 years. When it was time for the change, Teacher was surrounded by dozens of friends and admirers of different stages (ages). When Teacher returned to awareness, she was welcomed as a Tirrta. There was also a slight sense of grief among those present, for Teacher does not have a family, and therefore will never give birth, her evolutionary line ending with her life. Sensing this gave Teacher the greatest happiness, for with these feelings she realised that she truly is treasured by many.
Once the mind of Teacher began to grow and I sensed how it blossomed, filled with questions, ideas and dreams, I also came to love him-her. It is more difficult for me to empathise with Teacher at this time, for her female way of seeing life is mostly as the ways of our males. At least her mind remains bright, seeing through all that is of lesser importance to the heart of the truth being debated. I will owe a debt I can never repay, for I too have learnt and grown as I never would have on my own. As the tutor said, Teacher is loved.
1306
Visitors, whether scholars, tutors or just those wishing to show friendliness, have never adjusted to Teacher having lived as an animal with the dangerous Adrafert. They keep wanting to discuss why the animals would adopt Teacher and provide food. Teacher has grown enough to appreciate the reasons for their disbelief and does not get upset, sometimes making jokes about it, but never willing to try to recall what it was like. I, Geeta, have the AI recordings of those days, but I have locked them, for I do not have the right to share with others that which Teacher does not wish to share.
The Tirrta stage did not last as long as it should have and I overheard comments about it, the blame being her inability to give birth. I do not think it is so, I blame her unhealthy lifestyle, for she hardly ever tried to stand on her three limbs and rarely walked out of the house. After seven hundred and five days, Teacher began to change to a Tarral - losing once more the femininity of the previous stage.
Although some had held out a hope that the condition of the limbs of Teacher would improve with this change, they did not. They looked even more frail and friends found it difficult to convince Teacher to walk often enough for it to be of much benefit. Friends were fighting a losing battle, for visitors were coming from afar to talk with Teacher, often to debate arguments made in this house which had travelled halfway around the world. Teacher would often get so involved in the debates that it was hard enough to find the right time to convince everyone that it is time to eat. The truth is, sometimes even I would feel impatient of these necessary intervals.
Throughout all this time, one person remained constant - sweet Liahita tried to never miss a day and sometimes, once the debates began, stayed until the family came. When it was finally time for Liahita to change to a Refose, Teacher was so distressed at not being with (Liahita had to change at home, with the family), that Teacher was carried to a vehicle, carried into the home and then carried back again.
Only I could hear Teacher mentally wishing for the day of meeting the soul of Happy to arrive. I wondered at a love for a friend that not only lasted so long, but also remained so strong. There were times I tended to forget Teacher the person, because of my being awed by Teacher the Wise One, as others lovingly thought of Teacher.
After two hundred days as a Tarral, others began to see the changes in Teacher and realised this stage is not going to last long. As this stage is the one where most wise ones contribute the most new ideas to society, it grieved them and they tried everything they could think of to strengthen Teacher’s will to live, even shamelessly trying to exploit the love Teacher feels for Liahita. The truth is, Teacher would sink so deeply into thoughts that teased with promises of new ideas and truths, that Teacher barely noticed the reason for everyone’s worry.
At three hundred and fifty three days, when still only twenty one years old, Teacher changed, becoming a Ghofens. Teacher had not wanted this to happen, dreaming of doing as Happy had done and jumping directly to being a Cuinneara, but luckily it was not meant to be. Teacher pleased many by remaining pretty much the same person, more interested in learning than in forcing others to change the way they think. Then the most exciting news reached Teacher - visitors from another world were arriving. Excited at what new truths might be revealed, Teacher decided it is unlikely the visitors will visit, so Teacher prepared for visiting them by exercising. The legs of teacher remained frail and each step was like a stab of fire, but Teacher would not give up. Teacher trusted only Liahita with the plans for the visitors…for a visitor. I felt sad to think the end of our sharing was arriving, and on the day Teacher walked to where Liahita had seen me go, I knew I would soon be separated and back in my own body again - which I almost thought of as alien.
Teacher saw me in the distance and stopped. The next words spoken must have been an act of faith. ‘I am hoping you are in my mind, but it is nearly time for us to part. Did I tell you why I wanted you to share from me my life? As you may have realised by now, the ice cave you’ll find yourself in is only within my mind. It is, rarely, a way for families who deeply love each other to become one, but few succeed, most having to wait until they are Cuinneara. Have I succeeded, I whose family has only been a family of friends? Have you become friend…family? I fear I will never know, If I have and if you have grown to love me, I hope you can join me when I go to be with Happy. If not, do not doubt it will happen.’
I had expected to leave before Teacher snares my unsuspecting mind, but I watched my body follow back to the house and as it lay down and my mind left it, I tried to sense myself within Teacher but could not. I blanked out and when I became aware I knew I was back in my body.
My AI must have uploaded to the ship the entire experience, for within the hour the road outside filled with people from my ship. I managed to walk out and ask them to wait until I return to the ship and then entered what felt like my home, to sit with Teacher. It had taken me this long to learn how to communicate and start exchanging information and I was not ready to leave.
Hours later Teacher asked me, ‘Can you come to where our souls wait?’
‘I do not know. Have you managed to communicate with Happy?’
‘Yes.’ It was all Teacher said, and I did not ask for more.
‘I still do not understand how you did it. I’m guessing my past self is within you…now, not from the start of your life. I was only sharing your memories?’
‘When in the cave, it is deeper than that. In all which is important, you have been with me since my first day of life, but from my side, it was not so, it only is so.’
I smiled. ‘You still manage to confuse me! Teacher, why did you want me to share from you? Why me, an alien, a being of a different star system, with less possibility of understanding you than one of your own people?’
‘I chose you because you would want to know, to experience me and learn. Was I wrong?’
‘No, you were not. Teacher, I will be returning to my world, which is a great distance from here, but always a part of me will be here, thanks to you.’ I turned to Liahita. ‘Perhaps our friend will explain to you what we are talking about and perhaps not; but I want you to know, the one I call Teacher and you think of as Fawaya, has only deeply loved two people. The one called Happy, who you know of - and you. Because of sharing from Teacher, I also have grown to love you and I will miss you once I am gone.’
Geeta stayed for another fifty seven days, much of the time spent at the home of Teacher. She held his front limb as he died and she heard his voice calling. She followed and found herself in what we now call the void. She speaks of meeting Happy and his family and tells us that Teacher was enfolded and taken in as part of the family. She was told by Happy that souls of a family do not go to the void at the same time, so what they have learnt to do is think of it as being another stage, a part of living - which may explain, Robert, why the void does not try to get rid of them. Once all the family is re-united, they then take the time for their love to grow deeper and be fixed as a part of their souls for all eternity, and only then do they let go, and as souls move on to experience new beauties and loves. There is no end for souls, only new beginnings without losing what has been and all the love we've given and received.”
1307
I found myself teeming with questions, but waited, letting others ask first. Ordinx admitted he does not have much more to tell us, for he has shared all he learnt. The story, for us Cherinians, has left us awed, but the others who have never been to the void are still a bit sceptical, even though they try to hide it from us.
We had fruit and a light wine or fruit juice (interesting that they did not offer any of my loves a choice of the usual fizzy drinks again - I like it).
One of the Arab warriors came to his feet, joined his hands before him and bowed. I interpreted this as a request to ask a question. I told him he is welcome to ask.
“It is a question for the honourable Ordinx. Sir, of the many species your history records, is there one that stood out as being the most fearsome in appearance?”
“Since the last of my people lived on our planet,” Solomon winced and the thoughts and pain I imagined him and all Sparklers bear hurt me, “the many thousands of years have faded the memories of all our people, including myself. Only the entities of our Worlds, the Kaleidoscope Worlds, as Robert names them in his paintings, still recall details of our past, but they hold them from us, perhaps rightly waiting for the day we have bodies again. However, I think it would be safe to assure you that no such species has troubled our dreams, for once we allow ourselves to know them and understand what they hold precious, we seem to find too many points of similarity between them and us for us to fear or hate them - you do realise that most kinds of hatred are born out of fear?”
He sensed his audience was disappointed by his reply, so he continued, “Have any of you noticed how the face of those of another race seem ugly, but then, as you come to know one of them well, they no longer seem so ugly? It is the same with meeting other species. Some are incredibly beautiful and we lower our rules of caution and make fools of ourselves, and others seem ugly, but soon we no longer notice what seemed unpleasant, for they are such good people. However, I do recall that we met one species who look as if nature made at least one hundred mistakes when creating them. They are a gentle people with little interest in technology and are happy to live simple lives - and treasure each new friend they make. However, every time we would meet them, we would be amazed all over again at just how ugly they are. It also does not help that they constantly drool a greenish saliva and as it drips out of their wide mouth it stains whatever part of their body it touches plus the floor and any furnishing close to them, should they be invited into our offices or homes. Their solar system is surrounded by solar systems which have advanced species, with spaceships able to cross the inter-solar distances, so these people have made friends with at least fifteen other races.
We first started to see beyond their ugliness when one of them told us, ‘We are a lucky people, for our planet made us so ugly that whenever another species meets us, it helps them see all other species as beautiful, enabling them to become friends. It is good to know there is such a beautiful purpose to our existence.”
I was stunned by the picture Ordinx had painted in my mind and I hoped the species he spoke of still have lots of friends - though it is likely they are all held by the Sparklers. It was at this moment that Cherine chose to enter my mind to address a previous concern of mine regarding those we’d brought back to life - so it took me a few seconds to understand. *Please don’t feel bad for them Robert, I know that you will find a way to make everything good for them so that they are loved by everyone.* Just her faith in me was enough to make my heart glow, though I know it to be misplaced.
It was past midnight, but everyone was still too awake to want to sleep, so we were asked for another telling of our lives. I’m always happy to hear it from my loves, so I asked them to do the telling. When the girls ended, Dommi (as, supposedly and in fact my elder wife), spoke to Feizal’s father, showing him the proper respect, as Feizal would have wished it, “We must return home now, but we must also thank you for the most beautiful evening we’ve enjoyed for a very long time. You and your son are very generous people and for as long as we are welcome, we will be returning often to visit you.”
I added, “Having met Eddie, I hope you no longer fear the organisation, he has taken over again and as you’ve seen, he is with us now.” Eddie confirmed what I said and everyone from our group went around to thank everyone personally and wish them a good night.
At home, Sam asked me, “What about the gift John wanted to teach you?”
1308
“I have a feeling it is not the time yet for me to learn it. Perhaps, when it is time, the gift will come to me on its own. Sam, if I allow him to teach me, then he’ll feel obliged to demand I use it to hide him from our universe, since he’ll feel justified in believing I’ll ask for more powers - you know that even our closest friends find it impossible to accept that I really don’t want more powers. For as long as I accept nothing from him, he can live his life without worrying that he is affecting us.”
Tina then asked Cherine, “Were none of them worth linking? I thought you were going to link John and Feizal at least.”
Cherine nodded. “Maybe I should have, but Tina, I am troubled by the way they found it easy to kill. I need time to think about it.” It does not help Cherine think clearly about it, that I and Wendy, have killed - that each of them, her included, would have killed if it was to save me or any other person they love.
The next morning, we all jumped to the other Earth. The farmhouse was still in ruins and with the girls suitably aged we booked rooms in a hotel in the village. Little Cherine’s parents were gracious enough to go home by themselves, leaving their daughter, who looked about nineteen, alone with her Rob. I saw this Marian has also grown fond of Rob - no doubt our Marian played a role in that.
The girls and I looked at our rooms. They were tiny and we needed to all be together. I was stumped for a moment.
“Can’t we all go back home Robbie and return here later?”
So back home we went. I looked at the crowd of them and got the giggles. “I’m not used to this anymore. How the hell do I manage to hold and love so many of you at the same time?”
“Make some more Roberts.”
“I’ll make me into six, that way I’ll still have the pleasure of having at least two or three of you for each of me.”
“That’s selfish!”
“Boy do I feel like being selfish!!”
I came back from the bathroom as eight of us. One of us would have to love three but they did not complain. I would prefer to write from the vantage point of the one who had the three.
A point of interest, all my girls, apart from Candy, had chosen to be of the ages between eleven and thirteen. I wondered if this reflected a change in myself or their need to have me love them without worrying about hurting their tiny bodies. Even Dommi looked about twelve. It is very difficult to tell what the ages actually are, as not one of them has allowed their bodies to grow any hair under the arms or over their sweet mounds. At the most, their breasts were just slight mounds, as sweet as only the promise of breasts can be. I noticed they all had similar coral nipples, still shaped as those of little girls are.
My three were Aganthi, Em-e and Claudia. I had noticed it was Aganthi who left herself out as the third and then waited to see which pair would want her. In the reverse of how it would have been with any other bunch of girls, she was wanted by every couple and I found her choice interesting. I ignored the other two for the moment.
“You and I have some unfinished business to take care of my love.”
“This kind of business, it will never be finished Roberto, not as long as you love me.” We waited a moment while the Robert who had Cherine and Dommi explained.
“There are a number of you still virgins. I bet you all just want to go ahead and make love. I don’t blame you and will understand. Think of this though, you may be cheating yourself of a very important experience. You know of my predilection (προτίμηση) for spending a few days alone for the first experience with my loved one, becoming closer and building the moment up so that it will remain a special event for a long time in your and my memory. Soon as we return to the alternate world I will devote my time to giving you that experience. It is your choice.
1309
The second point. Every single one of you is overpowering me with your wish to have a baby. Not tonight my loves, not for any of you.” An undercurrent of disappointment swept through the room. “This may just be me being fussy, but I would rather you become pregnant from me when I am only one. To have it said that a child of mine came from only part of me does not seem right. I would also prefer we talk it over, one on one, not as a group. This sort of decision is too important to each of you for it to be a group thing. Any protests?”
I knew there would not be and even saw a few smiles amongst the girls. As I did not have a virgin amongst my group I returned my attention to Aganthi. The other two saw my choice and joined me with their hands, fingers, lips and tongues soft as butterfly wings, alighting here and there on both of us as I pulled her to me and kissed her deeply. When there is a deep love and affection for each other, there is something very intimate and arousing in two tongues playing and loving each other. For me, to breathe in the scent of her exhalation, to inhale the scent of her, these are all things that bring us closer to being one - as is the yearning to be within her/her yearning to have me within her.
I murmured softly next to her ear, “You know why you can always sell me flowers? Because you are the sweetest flower of all. I love you and your brave loyal heart more than you can imagine.”
“How can my heart not be loyal, it does not belong to me, it is yours.”
She was overcome with emotion when each of the girls took their turn in leaving their bed to come and kiss and murmur their love to her. It was their way of thanking her for disobeying me and watching over me. My sweet flower was soon reduced to tears and I held her tenderly. I knew this was the only moment I would be holding her tenderly, for I could feel the need in her to make love in a manner almost violent and explosive. She would be getting what she wanted. It would be almost impossible for any of us to be sweet and gentle, not with so many passions and fires being lit and shared at once.
All my parts were worried about this; passions, lust, carried to an excess can become unpleasantly violent. I know the girls do not worry about it as they know they can repair themselves, and pain born out of passion can become intoxicatingly sweet. I (we) did not want this, for the memory of such pain remains within me as a guilt. There is also sweet little Candy to worry about. I suggested Candy be loved now while there still is a sweetness and tenderness within all of us or that she wait until afterwards. The part of me who had her, resented my intrusion for a moment and we all ended up grinning at ‘him’.
My Aganthi is burnt a nutty chocolate brown by the sun of Africa, with freckles appearing over her nose. It made her look so appetising, a sweet girl made for nibbling and tasting, so I did not waste any more time.
Each of us have a preference for a certain fruit. Some may favour oranges, or mangoes, kiwi and so on. If I were to liken my girls to fruit I would have a problem. For though they each have their slight differences, in size, shapes, flavour and scent, I cannot say there is one I favour over the other. Neither in size, shape, flavour or scent. Each one stirs so much love in me, each body is so tantalising and sweet I adore them all.
As I loved my Aganthi, I did not forget to let my hands stray over to Em-e and Claudia. The feel of their sweet warm bodies up against us stoked the flames between Aganthi and myself so that we soon could not bear the burning needs within us, not one further lick or kiss was needed, only the desperate urge for fulfilment by becoming part of each other in the same timeless way of all lovers - even if it is different for us in so many ways. Soon her little twitches warned me, even if I had not been able to sense the sensations of her body and mind, and too soon we were exploding, our minds a fireworks that flashed throughout the room, sending other bodies into their own paroxysms.
Em-e was fully enjoying all the sensations, but seemed able to control herself, while Claudia was writhing with her own needs, her fingers and nails digging into me. With almost a look of apology at Aganthi I turned to Claudia, biting and kissing her as I entered her and then she drove us with her frenzy. Both the other girls were doing all they could to share with us until our loving reached its climax.
This was turning into a night of madness of desires, passions and explosions, for no sooner would one of us reach a satiation than the passion of another part of me would have us all burning to love these sweet morsels of love all over again. I do not know when it would have ended if not for Candy. She had been touched and touching, loved by ‘my’ lips and by Bernie, had spun over the crazy whirlpools of her own orgasms and shared all those of the others, as had all of us. She now pulled the face of Bernie to her and asked plaintively, a desperate need in her voice, “It is my turn now please, I also want him inside me.”
1310
Dommi froze all of us with her sudden fear. Candy began to cry and ‘I’ held her tenderly. “I also want to come into you, love your sweet little body and make you mine my love, but not as a five year old. I cannot, I would tear you, hurt you badly.”
“I’ll change. Please?”
“I beg you my love, please don’t. I love you as you are, all of us do. Wait for our week alone. I promise I’ll make it up to you.”
“I think we have to get going back to the other world anyway. You can have the first week with Robert, Candy, I promise.”
She looked at Cherine with the tiny teardrops still on her lashes and finally nodded her head in agreement. ‘I’ kissed and held her tiny body to me, luxuriating in the feelings of tenderness and love she brought to ‘me’ and then we all got up to dress and leave. ‘We’ returned to the bathroom where all eight of us faded back into one mind and body again.
Back at our hotel we found we were all tired and turned in for the night. Since I had a double bed I took my twins with me. They kissed their mother Diana goodnight and happily came along. I grinned at them.
“Don’t get too happy, we are only going to sleep, we all need some rest.” Grinning they agreed with me but I did not need to look deeply into their minds to know that sleeping was not what they were planning. I laughed and gave their little bottoms a smack. They both knew that they had me at a disadvantage, the special attraction that exists between their mother and themselves and I, is not so unbearable anymore, but it still exists and my body was already reacting. They felt it and whipped off their dresses, pulling them over their heads and I saw they had not bothered to wear anything underneath. They laughed with pleasure and a sort of pride as I stared at them, tingles of desire already racing through me.
“You said once that there is no rest for the wicked…” - “…and we are feeling very wicked.”
“I should have chosen one of the other girls.”
“Which one do you think would have let you sleep?”
I did not argue the point, but took my time, washing and undressing in the bathroom. They were both waiting for me, the sheets almost up to their chins, one on either side with a space left for me in the center. I climbed over Nicole and slid under the sheet. They both turned as one and came into my arms. They each ran one hand over my chest and belly. It was a nice warm feeling, but not unbearably sexy. As I sort of relaxed, they both moved their heads and took a nipple each in their mouths and began to suckle. I smiled, it felt wonderful and was sexy, but it also reminded me that they were both in reality still babies, or toddlers. It is so easy to forget, to just think of them as being the age they appear to be.
Whatever I remembered, their bodies still were the bodies of two eleven year old girls, just at the very first stages of blossoming, and the satiny feel and warmth of them, the tingle of their touch all conspired to awaken my desire so that it became a desperate need. They each placed a leg over me and rested it within my thighs and slowly rubbed the smooth skin of their legs over me.
Alexis slid down my body, setting off alarm signals in my nerve-endings, while Nicole moved upwards and she turned around. I think more of the center of my mind was sunk within the two of them than within myself, feeling my body almost less than I felt theirs, the sensations that raced through them as they also shared between them, not only their sensations, but also the physical loving of each other. I was surprised to realise they had never loved each other this way before and the novelty of it was exciting them.
I knew they had almost reached the moment of no return and re-focussed on my own body, enjoying the scents, tastes and tactile sensations of both of them, my own hips responding in thrusts until the three of us came in one strong burst of ecstasy.
Once the fondling and kissing was over they lay to either side of me again, their heads nestled on my shoulders.
“Was I a naughty daddy’s girl?”
I knew she was not talking about me. “You mean because you enjoyed loving your sister?”
Αλέξανδρος Ζήνον Ευσταθίου
(Alexander Zenon Eustace)3rd July, 2019
- posted on Steemit: 3rd July, 2019