We noticed that. We will compare histories with them to find out where theirs differed from ours.
1051
*I can tell you part of it. They were more successful at denuding the universe of life. There is not one of the species of Ordinx. As the void I was able to take a limited look into the past movements of the Sparklers. They managed to get every single World of his people.*
*We guessed as much and are in agony. You fear telling Ordinx?*
*His people are old, not in years, but in attitude. The old lose their resilience. I do fear telling him, unless we have an answer that will give them hope.*
*Robert, we see your energy is damaged. Has this weighed that heavily on you?*
*You are observant. No, I was forced to act in a savage manner to a child. That child was the Cherine of her world. She is only half the age of my Cherine. I had to do it for her own good, but it lays like a stone around my neck, dragging me down into a depression.*
He mimicked the sound of a laugh. *It is as well I came to your world or else I would not have understood you. You also fear the result of what you did?*
I explained in detail, knowing he would understand most of what I said. He was silent for a while.
*Now that I know you and can understand how this damages you, I grieve for you. You have become a Sparkler Robert. You intend to do only good, but now your conscience has assumed a guilt you do not deserve.*
*I fear she may not understand and may grow to hate and fear me.*
*But she will love this other Robert and her people will grow. I do not know the way of thinking of your people well enough, but if you did what you had to do, all that remains is for you to hope she is as your Cherine, for if she is, she will grow to understand.*
*I thank you Solomon, I come with news that must be troubling you and yet you take the time to feel my pain. I was right, the Sparklers are a good people to have as friends. If I cannot return for a time, please do not wait for me. Whichever of my girls can help, call for them.
With Ordinx you must find a way to release his people and heal their damage. Those that you try this on, so as to learn, you may send them to the world of Meli, I am certain they will be welcomed and cared for by the old ones. I must leave you now to return and struggle with my body again.*
“Sam, you heard. Make your arrangements with them. Whoever can help must do so. Perhaps the mothering instinct of Dommi would help. Do not tell Ordinx the news, let it be Solomon. Will you manage my love?”
“I will father. Please promise me one thing.”
“And that is?”
“Do not withdraw to remain alone. Tina says you must gather the youngest and let them play with you and by you. You need their love, not your thoughts of darkness. She speaks correctly father.”
“I will do as she says, at least most of the time. Thank you.”
Hours later Dommi quietly came into the dark room, sensing I had woken.
“Alki has brought you his chicken soup.” She giggled. “Shall I bring it, or will you join us.”
“I’d rather not. Dommi, there is a saying, the more everything changes the more everything stays the same. I continue to be a problem for you and Cherine, as I have been since we loved.”
“Very true, though not for only the two of us. Now you have a large family to worry for you. If we are to live for hundreds of years I suppose you will stay the same in this regard for all of them. We will be there for you all that time my love.”
I laughed with delight at her transparent ways. “Dommi mou, you will remain a Greek women to the end of your days. Nothing like having you dramatise things to make me feel foolish and self indulgent.”
1052
“That means you will join us for supper? It will be casual, in the lounge.”
“How can I refuse you?”
“You will give that child nightmares for the rest of her life, you must fix it Robert.”
“How Marian. Understanding my motives will not help.”
“Maybe the girls can help. Dommi, you are the mother, what would you do?”
“I do not know. What Robert did to her would have terrified an adult. I think the only thing we can do is remove the memory from her.”
I insisted, “As long as she remains fixated on that Robert. She must love him, not me.”
Dommi said, “You must strengthen yourself so that we may return there soon.”
“I do not think it a good idea that I return there. Not just now.”
Cherine demanded, “You must. She must grow to like and trust you again.”
I admitted, “I am totally out of my depth. I will do as you say, so please think it through first and be certain.”
Dommi replied, “Cherine, I hate to do this, but I think we must go while Roberto is in this condition. He can stay on the farm to recover. You will have to stay with him. Little Cherine must see for herself the effect she has had on him.”
“Is Irene strong enough yet to come with? I’d like to have her and Aganthi.”
Cherine did not say a word, but I felt her send me her approval. Some time on a farm will do wonders for Aganthi. She has grown up in a city, seeing all the worst life has to offer. The countryside will do her a lot of good.
I stayed a couple more days to see that all is in order. With Dommi also coming, Marian and Alki moved over to our house, though they will sleep in the guest rooms. Knowing they will be with my girls helped give me peace of mind. Marian came to me just before we left and pulled me aside.
“I’ve been thinking, trying to remember what I used to be like. She will not trust you, even if you gave her baby girl back to her. She cannot understand anyone doing anything without there being a selfish motive. Show her that you have something to gain, altruism will just make her more suspicious of you.”
“Are you glad you changed Marian? I hate manipulating people, but we had to do it with you. Not that I expected you to change and become such a lovely person.”
“If there is no goodness inside, no manipulation can create it. You only helped her remember what is really important to her and who she is.” Alki gave her a hug and she smiled at him affectionately.
I asked my ‘father’ as soon as we arrived, “How many days have passed since we left?”
“Nearly two weeks. Rob is over at Cherine. I hardly ever see him. She refuses to go to school as she insists he must stay by her all the time.”
“Do you see them at all?”
“Usually late afternoon till evening.”
“What is your impression dad, is she using him, does she see him as her protector only, or does she love him?”
“I think she is beginning to love him. She enjoys his company.”
“You better go then Dommi, it is time we end her fear.”
1053
Dommi was gone the whole day, which I spent mostly just walking the countryside with Aganthi and Irene in our arms. We sat by the stream and Irene became a girl of seven again. Aganthi had brought clothes with and she dressed.
“It is weird seeing my face on you. At least you improved it a bit by adding some of your mother’s fine features.”
“Why aren’t there any raspberries here?”
“That is in the world of Meli sweetheart. Do you like it here?”
“Yes, but mummy feels strange, she is not used to no houses around her.”
“That is why I brought her here. A few weeks in the country will do all of us some good. I suggest that during the day you stay this age so that you can run around and play. It will get boring just staying a baby the whole time.”
“I have an idea Robbie. I think you will not like it.”
“Tell me anyway.”
“Why don’t you become a baby. Let us look after you. It will be good for you.”
“Are you going to change my nappies and wash them?”
“Silly, you are not really a baby. If you do dirty them, I will.”
“I’ll think about it. You may be right.”
Aganthi was excited. “She is right Roberto. Become a baby and I will take you to little Cherine. If she sees you as a baby she will not fear you.”
“Too right - she just might decide to attack me. You do know that my protector refuses to help me with her.”
“It is silly. It doesn’t have to hurt her, but it can stop her from hurting you.”
“It sees the need in her to hurt me, so it feels that if it stops her it is hurting her. The protector may be powerful, but it is also a stupid baby itself in many ways.”
“Take a chance Roberto. Maybe we can sell her some flowers?”
“Shouldn’t we wait for Dommi to return?”
“No. Roberto, it is the same as playing puppy.”
“Damn, but you girls keep on finding excuses to make me look ridiculous. We better go to the farm where you can put a nappy on me.”
She giggled, “We have this one from Irene.”
Soon as Dommi saw me she realised it was me. She sent me a burst of love and approval.
“You are Cherine? You please excuse me, my English is not so good. Roberto calls me his Albanian girl, I am Aganthi and this is our daughter Irene. Do you know this baby?”
“No.” She came close and looked at me. She gave me her finger and I took hold of it. “Can I hold him? I won’t drop him.”
They let her hold me and she played with me for a while. When she sat down on the carpet and cradling me began rocking motions, I closed my eyes and she was enthralled, thinking she was putting me to sleep.
1054
“Cherine, you know that Roberto of mine, he is so good, but sometimes he is also a very stupid man. Is your Roberto also stupid sometimes?”
“No. I hate your Robert. He is horrible.”
“You know that what he did to you, it made him very sick. The other Cherine and all his girls, we got very afraid for him.”
“I’m glad. I hate him.”
“Do you hate him or are you only a little afraid of him?”
“I’m not afraid of him. I hate him.”
“He will be very sad to hear that. You see, he was afraid you would love him. You can, but only as a friend. He got too afraid and did those horrible things to make you not love him. But now he remembers what he did and he got very sick.”
“I’m glad!”
“I think my Cherine is nicer than you. She can feel the pain in other people so she never hates anybody. Can’t you feel how other people feel?”
“I can. Better than her I bet!”
“I think you cannot. Let’s do a test. Feel how the baby feels and tell me.”
She nearly dropped me. She began to cry. “Mummy, the baby is very sad. It wants to die. It is afraid.”
“What is it afraid of? Why is it so sad?”
“I don’t know - it is only a baby, how can I guess?”
“You want me to tell you why the baby is dying?” She stared at her, her eyes huge. “That baby you are holding is not really a baby. It is the Robert you hate. We had to make him into a baby to try and make him better.”
At least she did not throw me away. She put me down on the carpet and made to pull away. I smiled at her and held on to her finger. She let me hold it, but sat as far away as she could. Soon as my fingers relaxed she pulled away, sitting almost on the other side of the room.
“You do not have to be afraid of him. Cherine, you really hate him?”
“Yes.”
Dommi spoke up. “While he is a baby he cannot hurt you. If you hate him you have my permission to pick him up and go to the front door, to the concrete steps outside and throw him down hard, on his head. That will kill him and you never have to be afraid of him again.”
Marian cried out, but her husband held her back. “It is up to Cherine, let her decide what to do.”
She came back to me, slowly and wary of me. I gurgled and smiled. She put out a hand and touched me. Suddenly her face was hard and grim and she picked me up.
“I can really do what you said?”
“Yes. He wants you to feel better and if you have to kill him to feel better we have to let you.”
I felt the anger in her and her wish to kill me and it hurt. I told the protector that if the others tried to stop her it must not let them, and wept at the damage I have done to her. She saw my tears and stopped bewildered. She looked across at Rob who was staring at her, his horror in his eyes. Slowly she bent over and put me down again.
“You are trying to trick me. You want to make me bad like him.”
She ran to Rob and he picked her up and held her in his arms.
1055
For all our babies we only use the old-fashioned nappies. I got Irene to come and undo mine and lay it like a towel on me. I grew myself to the age of about five and sat up. She stared at me, fear in her eyes again.
“You remember that monster in the void, the one I made to frighten you? There is something else called the protector and it is stronger than that monster. It could kill a thousand monsters like that one easy-peasy. But the protector is good, it is not a bad monster. It loves children and looks after them. I am going to tell it to show itself to you.”
The protector became a creature of pure white light, shimmering as a curtain of light between her and me. Everyone in the room gaped at it, but I saw she was still afraid of it because she sensed it comes from me.
“Some time ago I hurt my Cherine by mistake and the protector got angry with me and killed me. Luckily for me, my Cherine loves me a lot and she came to the void and brought me back. I now do not have my Cherine with me, so if I die, the void will eat me, you remember what it feels like, you sent the feeling to me last time.
The monster you saw in the void, it was only a picture, I was tricking you to stop you from hurting me. Cherine, you do not believe me, but I do love you. I love you because I love my own Cherine so much, can you understand that? I do not want you to grow up afraid. Especially not of me. It makes me sick with pain inside. I would rather die.
I will tell the protector, I will explain to it how badly I hurt you and it will get very cross and kill me. That way you do not have to be the bad one, nobody will blame you. If I do this, will you stop being afraid and will you stop hating me?”
She refused to answer me, only her eyes staring at me as she huddled in his arms. Rob pulled her face up to his. “Please don’t let him do this Cherine. For me?”
“Don’t Rob. It must come from her. Marian, the protector will not attack me as a child. Can I have a pair of your husband’s trousers. I do not think you want the sight of an adult in the nude.”
Dommi was pleading with me not to do it, but I refused to answer her. Irene and Aganthi could hear her and they too looked at me with a plea in their eyes. Suddenly Cherine, my Cherine arrived, her face pale with fear. Dommi had told her what I am about to do.
“I will not allow it to kill you. How can you kill yourself because one silly child hates you, there are so many of us who love you!!”
By mind-speak I told her the protector and healer will make me a new body, they will not lose me.
“Cherine love, if it was a child that hated me, that simple, I would agree. This child fears me more than she hates me. I am to blame for that fear. If I have to die to rid her of that fear, then I must die. Little Cherine knows what it feels like to die. She had me to bring her back. I will stay dead until she can stop being afraid.”
Marian brought me the trousers and also pleaded with me not to do it.
“I have to. Do not worry about having to get rid of my body. The body will be destroyed.” I stood up in her husbands large pants. “Cherry, do not get afraid. The girls made me a baby to try and make me well again. I now have to make myself a grown up so that the protector will hurt and kill me. I will not hurt you. Okay?”
She stared without speaking and then nodded. Irene took a couple of steps and stood in front of her.
“He is my daddy and I love him very much, I need him. If he dies because of you, I will never forgive you.”
“I think this has gone far enough. You do not have the right to make a child responsible for your life or death!”
“I agree. That is why I will kill myself.”
1056
The protector rippled and wrapped itself around me. It raised me into the air, close to the ceiling, and slammed my body into the floor. Bones snapped and I screamed. It picked me up again and Cherine ran under it, screaming at it to stop. My blood dripped onto her upturned face.
It slammed me into the wall, leaving a smear of blood. Cherine and Dommi jumped and grabbed hold of my body, trying to stop the protector. Even as they held to me, they saw the protector thicken as it wrapped around my leg and snapped it.
Little Cherine started to scream to her Robert to stop it, not to let it kill me. The protector set me down and went to her. It spoke directly into her mind.
*If he ever hurts you again I will make him feel even more pain and then I will kill him. Do not ever be afraid. Your Robert and I will always protect you.*
Irene pleaded, “He is hurt! Fix him please.”
“Cherry?” She looked at me. “I have been hurt too much, I cannot fix myself, the protector cannot fix me. Only one person can, but that person must really want to. You are that person. Do you want to?”
“I can’t!!”
“All you have to do is put your hand to me, touch me somewhere, anywhere you want. Keep your hand there and you will see me being fixed.”
Rob brought her to me and from the safety of his arms she touched my hand. The healer made a big show of bones moving back into position, wounds closing and within half an hour or so I was sitting on the floor completely healed.
I took the hand that had been touching me and kissed it lightly.
“Thank you. You have a very big heart. I hope you will always stay as sweet as you are.” I gave her a grin. “I think you want me to leave, you’ve had enough of me for one day?” She nodded. “Can I ask you one last thing? You know how to go to the void. Do you know how to use it?”
Rob cut in, “Robert, I think I would rather wait till she is older.”
“I understand and we probably have to wait for you to get your Wendy. My problem is that your circle would be only made of two people. It is not enough for you to create your own World, you must be three, but in the meantime, you must become comfortable with being in the void.. Do you know what the void World is Cherry? When people die, they go to the void. If three of you love each other and you get together in the void, you can make a World of your own. Then you can take your mummy and daddy and other people, dance with them in the void and let yourself taste their love. That way, if they die, the void cannot eat them. They go to your World, where you can look after them.”
She was terrified of the void and listened to me with huge eyes. She desperately wanted this ‘fairy story’ to be true, but did not trust me. She still had a suspicion that I want to get her to the void for my monster to eat her. If I did not resolve this immediately, it will get more difficult later.
“I will stay here and talk to my Cherine, but I would like all of you to go with Dommi and Aganthi, they can show you how and keep you safe. Rob, my protector will be yours to watch over you. The green stars you see, they are an alien race, the ones I called the Sparklers. Do not go near them, without me you cannot talk to them. Dommi you take over while I go to the bathroom and get rid of this mess. Marian, have you got an old towel I can use?”
Alt Marian came with me and soon as we were out of the room she spoke. “I do not want to go to this thing you call the void.”
“Your daughter will be going there often. You will live in fear for as long as you do not go. Marian, it may seem remarkable, but your daughter can protect you there. If you agree to go, it will give her comfort. I terrified her there last time. Please?”
“Why have you been doing all this?”
1057
“For selfish reasons. If Cherine, yours, does not become as powerful as mine, then I will have the job of looking after the people I love in this world. I am very powerful Marian. What you saw my protector do to me, that was just playing. Within that same amount of time it could kill an army of millions. It already has. Aliens we met in the void. We thought they were insects come to eat us and I killed about two hundred million of them. Can you imagine my guilt when I realised they were intelligent beings, their sole purpose being their mission to save as many souls as they can throughout the universe from being eaten by the void. Since then my body has weakened. It refuses to heal itself.
Every time I jump here it does damage to my body. It is taking too much energy to fight and keep my body alive. What I did today, you saw my girls, they were terrified, they know I truly did bring my death closer. If your Cherine can look after all of you, then I can stay at home and get stronger again. If not, I will soon be physically crippled and then even our healers will not be able to save me. I do not want to die.”
“If anyone else had told me this I would not believe them. You have brought my daughter back from death, you have shown me too many weird things for me not to believe you. I’ll have to trust you, despite all you did to hurt my daughter.”
“If I had not, she would have loved me. That would have been a catastrophe. Officially she is dead, what are you doing to get papers for her again? Do you need help?”
“You better ask my husband.”
“I will, but in the meantime, do not try to tell the truth. They will think she is someone else’s daughter and that you stole her. Civil servants do not have any rules for miracles.” She laughed at that, handed me the towel and returned to her daughter.
Cherine told me when they were gone and I joined her.
“I am so angry with you, I’ll never forgive you. We try to watch over you, look after you when you get worse and have to stay in bed. We even stay without sex for you. Then you go and do something crazy like this. Your body will make you pay for what you did today.”
“It won’t. I have wised up a bit my love. What you saw, it was the same thing we do when we change our age or shape. My body was not really damaged. Sorry I leaked the blood on you, that was very effective I think.”
“You bastard! I don’t know whether to laugh or cry.”
“I would quite happily settle for a hug.”
When they all returned I saw the awe in the eyes of her parents. Even dad who had read my diary was affected. I foresaw a danger to their little Cherine and invited them out for a drink at the nearest pub. When I insisted, the father realised I was doing this for a reason and accepted. Rob stayed with his Cherine.
“I saw the way you were looking at your little girl. It was as if she were a little goddess. She is in many ways, but in the ways that should be important to you, she is still a small child. Your role in her life is to be her parents. It is very important that you maintain the discipline you are used to. It will damage her if you change your attitude to her now.”
Marian asked, “How can I smack her when she is naughty!”
“Marian, Cherine does not need to be smacked. She never did. Her gift is the one of empathy. She feels your emotions. If you feel angry at her or hurt or disappointed, she will feel it. If you smack her, you are letting her off the hook. If she has to deal with your emotions, then you will find her becoming the good little girl you want her to be.
It is true of all children, but most parents take the easy way out, it is far easier to just give a smack. More satisfying too no doubt, but then the child feels they have been punished so they can forget about what they did wrong. If a child loves you and you show your hurt or disappointment in them, they will be far more aware and will make the effort not to let you down again.”
Dad spoke up. “Please be careful of how you use this weapon. If you are petty in your emotions, showing disappointment in them for every silly thing they do, it will have the opposite effect. I know, for that is what I did and nearly lost my son. Restrict your strong feelings for only the important transgressions. As for the rest, a word of reprimand, a look in the eyes, they will be enough. Do not respond to her if you feel she is testing you on purpose.”
1058
I decided it is time I lighten the mood. “Do you find, as I do, that your daughter has the loveliest soul imaginable?”
“Oh yes!” they both answered breathlessly.
Her father told me, “Robert, I never saw her talents as a gift, all I could think of is how other people would react and feared for her. Your way is far better. She needs to grow with people like her so that they can protect her.”
“If she is careful not to make her gifts obvious and she grows as a person, there will be no need to use any gift as a power. It must be stressed by all, but more importantly by your Robert, that it is not allowed and is not forgivable if anyone uses their gifts to hurt another human being.”
I explained about the sexual feelings they were going through and explained how little Cherine will also be suffering. “I know it goes against the grain, she is only five years old! Think of her as not being a normal human being. In some ways she is older than you. If she changes her body age so that she looks thirty years old, could you control her, would you even try?
She has shared the sex of all your neighbours since she was a baby, but still it is important that the sex she has with her Robert is not made into something bad or shameful. It has to happen, but Robert is extremely sensitive about hurting her in any way, so you won’t have to worry about that side of it. Rather than have them sneak off, would it not be better to explain to them you understand their needs and that as long as they are discrete and Robert is mindful of her tender age, you would prefer they sleep together without hiding it from you?”
I had one last word of warning for them. First I explained about what we call the ‘circle’ and the effect it has on us. “If Cherine was to be just one of your Cherinians, I would not say this, there are many Cherinians on our world who are in a circle, parents and children - including myself. Your Cherine and Robert will be the leaders in your reality. They must be the founders of their own circle. With you as parents in there, they would feel they have to obey you. It would destroy their effectiveness.
I think you too would not be comfortable having sex with your own daughter, so I suggest you find someone you love and would be happy to be in a circle with. Once there are three of you, it is possible for you to create your own World.”
“Robert, a lot of what you are telling them I read about in the story my son wrote. Would it not help them to read it?”
“The idea of my personal life being read by everyone does not appeal to me. I am writing my diary basically for my own family to read. I think that the parents of Cherine would qualify as family, though they are not what I had in mind. My thoughts were, if my diary is read by my children and their children, they will have an entirely different attitude to sex and will not be critical. Her parents will not be able to resist judging me according to the upbringing they had. Think about it dad, you are better able to judge. If you decide it would do more good than harm, I can live with the embarrassment.”
When we got home, little Cherine who should have been asleep long ago was still up, sitting on the lap of Rob, her stroking of his arm, her cuddling up to his chest, her squirming all betraying her needs. Aware of them now, her parents saw and understood they had little choice. They talked to Rob (his face was scarlet) and sent them off to sleep together. Within minutes little Cherine was emoting their feelings and I quickly got all of us to jump back to the farm, leaving the parents free to indulge their own needs.
“Cherine, you must teach her the basics. She must know how to control her emoting to the people she wants to include only.”
Dommi returned home after a few days. She is not a ‘country’ person, preferring the amenities and bustle of the city. I spent a few days just walking around with my loved ones, getting to know my little Irene. I then started to help with the farm work, my body having to adjust again. Aganthi learnt to milk the two cows and with her daughter saw to the feeding of the chickens and dogs. Thanks to her efforts we also began to eat some proper meals. She never missed a trip to the village and made a few friends there. Irene, to others, was her little sister and was quite a hit with the local girls.
1059
Cherine was beginning to spend a lot of time with her alter ego and her parents. As she got to know her father from a more adult point of view she also saw more clearly his weaknesses. She now began to accept that her father had been running away from her mother. This Marian was bad enough, but nowhere as hard as her own mother had been. We discussed this and came to the conclusion that the death of her little child had changed her for the better - instead of for the worse.
I am known in the village as the elder brother of Rob, though we explained we come from different mothers, that being the reason we have the same name. His father is slowly becoming known as an eccentric and is always welcomed at the local pub. He enjoys himself telling them stories about his Kenya days and I guess they tolerate them (he’s not a good storyteller) because they all tell their stories - most of which I guess are not true.
Seeing ‘my’ father got me thinking and as I got used to having him around, enjoying his company and I find his advice always sound, so I began to think of my own father. I waited until I had a thumbs up from my healer and called my protector.
“Dad, I want you to allow my protector to enter your mind. It needs to see when your wife died and where she was. I want to go back to…”
“Robert, I do not know. She left a suicide note and disappeared. Her body was never found.”
It felt as if my knees weakened. “Jesus!! Oh fuck!!!”
“What!”
“If it is what I think it is, you will be angry with me.”
“I’ll try not to be. Can you explain yourself?”
“You said you want her with her baby, so I can’t give her a new body. I’m thinking of going and getting her just before she killed herself, to bring her to this time. Your difference in ages would not matter - you are already looking younger and will continue to rejuvenate. It would mean that all this time, till now, when you thought she was dead, she was…is…in your future.”
It hit him hard. I thought to myself how typically stupid of me. If I had just brought her, he would have been grateful, now he will resent me.
“Go get her for me, if you can stop her from killing herself I will be grateful forever, whether she returns to me or not. I have not only missed her, I’ve had her death on my conscience.”
“You feel alright about seeing your mum again Rob?”
I need not have asked, the tears were streaming down his face.
Cherine, my little tower of strength came with me. To go back in time we had to return to our own world, our reality, then aim to return at the time we chose. We could not go back directly. I gambled that this could work and it did, even though I’d never been to their farm - but, as I’d hoped, the farm is the same as the one I remember. This was not the same as returning for a cell and the soul of the alt Cherine, I actually had to return in time and be at the place I want to be in our bodies.
We returned in time to her place of death, outside Nairobi. Just for those who missed out on my previous explanations - we had been living in Kenya then, my father had bought a small coffee plantation and was struggling to make ends meet. I based our jump on these facts, trusting the details will be close enough for us to make it there at the time I planned for. We arrived early in the morning on the day of her disappearance. My father had told me at what time he’d left for work after breakfast - to explain that. He would usually be up and in the fields to watch the workers by six and return for breakfast at nearly eight. By half past he would return to the fields. Most farmers work that way.
I knocked on the door and she came to see who it is. Her face was tense and we could sense she was anxious to get rid of us. She looked at me, scrutinising me carefully. I think she may not have opened the door if I had not had Cherine with me. Seeing a man with a little nine year old girl gives the impression of safety.
1060
“Hi Rose. You do not recognise me, but I know you are not the kind of woman who shrieks and faints, you are the type who blazes up into a temper, thanks to the Irish in you, so I’m going to give you the facts straight up. Rose, I am Robert, your son. I have come back into the past to stop you killing yourself - which you were about to do. I would bet you have already placed your suicide note on the pillow of my father.” She was close to fainting from shock and I moved to catch her.
It took me nearly an hour to convince her. I had to explain I would not be changing the past. In the future she had already disappeared or died on this day.
“Mother, I do not only want to save you. You are carrying my sister Laura. She belongs with us. I love her very dearly and she will be your little treasure.”
“What of your father?”
“He has born the guilt for too many years. He is no longer the man you know here. He has become gentler and shows his feelings now. For all these years he has only loved you. He has said that he wants me to bring you to the future. He says that if you cannot bear to be with him he will understand, though he wants to be the father of Laura and love her.”
“How do you know about her, I never told anyone that I wanted to call her Laura if she is a girl.”
“Mother, dad told me he returned here to pick up his gun at about quarter to eleven. We must be gone before he arrives. I wish there was something we could do to ease his pain, but we must not.”
She was not a cruel woman and did not want to go through with it.
“If you do not come, you will kill yourself - if not today, then someday soon, which means you’ll also kill Laura. We both know how hard and cold he is and your good intentions won’t change him, only your death will. Your apparent death will make him a much nicer person. If we change the past it will not change the future, this will just become another world, one in which you did not die today and in the future my father will still have lived through your death/disappearance of today. The future cannot be changed.”
I gave her my hand. “Hold on to my hand. If I am talking nonsense, nothing will happen, if I speak truly, we will go first to my home where you will meet your daughter Laura, though she is not exactly this daughter. I’ll explain there. Or maybe you will explain to yourself.” I cryptically added.
She gave a scream as she found herself in our lounge. Wildly she stared around at the group of girls that surrounded us. One of them stepped forward.
“I am Laura.”
She stared at her, surprised and shocked and yet not able to accept it because the features did not look like hers or those of her lover.
“Rose, you are not on the world you grew up on. This is an alternate world. In this one you did not commit suicide. Your husband got back early, found you in time and took you to the hospital. He then sent you to Ireland where you had your baby Laura. That Laura died at the age of four. When I grew up, I found my mother and brought her here. Since then she has married a Greek and had this Laura by him. The soul though, it is the same soul of the original Laura. Let my mother explain to you - I think you will have to believe her.”
My mother now entered the room and they stared at each other. My mother recovered first and smiled at her. “It may help if you think of me as your sister.”
We stayed home for a few days, giving her time to adjust and understand. My two mothers became very close friends and my Rose asked if I would see to it that they be able to visit each other often.
“Dommi, I was amused at how you jumped to London for some milk. Now it seems we are going to be jumping to another world just for tea and a chat.”
They all laughed with me, my girls mostly from the delight they sensed in me.
As expected, she was shocked when she realised these little girls are my daughters, some of them, and all of them my wives. My Rose had to take her away for the day to talk to her. She became very close to my daughter Rosie (strange how we get affected by someone being named after us), but I was also surprised to find that she became extremely close to my Cherine.
Αλέξανδρος Ζήνον Ευσταθίου
(Alexander Zenon Eustace)9th June, 2019
- posted on Steemit:9th June, 2019