When a woman is called high maintenance , it’s usually in relation to dating and the princess-like treatment they demand, but that is not what I mean with me being high maintenance. I am high maintenance to myself, not to other people. I require a lot of self care because I want to look good, and I’m not ashamed to admit it.
My ultimate aim is to look as good as I can, when I am naked and have no makeup on. I want to be the best me. I draw the line at cosmetic surgery, fillers, botox, hair, lash and nail extensions, anything else I’m willing to do if it makes me look better. If I were to tell you how much money, time and effort I use for trying to look good, you’d be absolutely mortified.
Who sets my standards?
I'm not quite sure where my high standards for myself come from, especially not in terms of looks. My mom has never worn makeup and doesn’t really care that much about her looks, so she never encouraged me to play with makeup or to do any self care other than take a shower, do sports and not eat too much candy.
I never really read much of Cosmopolitan or something like that which would have told me how I need to look, I always found those kinds of magazines irritating. But I have always been interested in trying to make myself look the best that I possibly can, with the genetic material provided to me, and the tools I can use to enhance myself. I am very very passionate about the world of beauty.
I am not going to say that society never effects my beauty standards in any way, but I do my own thing and I don’t follow trends. I know what I like and what works for me, and something like pubic hair coming back in style is not gonna make me grow mine, or lash extensions being the new norm doesn’t make me want to get any.
I do it all for me
It’s a cliche when someone says they want to look good for themselves, and not for other people, yet don’t take care of themselves during the wintertime or unless they have a hot date coming. Let me assure you, I care about my looks more than anyone else could ever possibly care.
I don’t care if a man doesn’t see me in months, or nobody really, I like to take care of myself, for myself. For example, I disgust myself if I haven’t scrubbed, shaved and moisturised my skin properly in a couple days.
I have gotten a lot of shit during my life about being high maintenance because I don’t pack light, sleep in a shitty hostels, go camping or take an extempore trip. People, men especially, keep saying to me that they don’t care if I haven’t shaven, don’t have makeup on or whatever, but they are always missing the point when I say I need to do something for myself. I DO NOT GIVE A FUCK WHAT YOU THINK, I ONLY GIVE A FUCK WHAT I THINK. And I think that I want to have silky smooth legs, shiny hair and shimmering skin, preferably all the time. Thank you, next.
Am I making my life harder than it needs to be? Yes. But am I making my life what I want it to be? Definitely!
My life is my fantasy and I make it what I want it to be, because I’m the one who has to live in it. If I am not happy in my bodysuit, you sure as hell won’t want to be near me because I’m a horrible bitch if I am not comfortable with myself first.
Design and create your ideal life, don't live it by default.