What are the characteristics of a better person?
Many people hope that they can become better and gain control in life. But they always have no clue, not even a specific direction.
It is true that it is not something that you can achieve overnight.
But when you have a specific direction, at least you know what to do to get closer to the goal.
The following five things are most people done to become a better self.
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Learn to think correctly
What kind of thinking can be called "correct"?
Correct thinking is a thinking that able to solve the problem. This problem is not necessarily a concrete matter; it can also be an abstract concept.
Larry, the former president of Harvard University, once said that the important qualities that a good Harvard student needs to have, other than integrity, is having a clear mind to analyze problems.
"Think clearly" is the characteristic of correct thinking.
Now here's a question: "Why is the phone designed to be rectangular, not circular, rhombic or other shapes?"
Can you give a very clear picture of your thinking process?
To be able to think clearly and correctly, you have to know how to assume, how to argue and how to reason, and these are the logical logic that we are familiar with.
And behind the logic, is to build on the accumulation of knowledge.
In other words, correct thinking = use existing knowledge to put forward hypothesis + establish effective argumentation + use logical thinking deduction.
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Do one thing at a time
Doing things that you've never done before will refresh your brain's awareness and allow us to grow fast.
But to master unfamiliar things, you must devote enough energy to do it wholeheartedly.
Many people feel that they can multitask like a computer.
The truth? A psychologist at Stanford University has experimented on multitasking. The experimenters tested 22 volunteers who thought they couldn't multitask and 19 volunteers who considered good at multitasking to handle graphics, letters, and numbers.
The result is obvious, as the difficulty of the topic rises, the cognitive ability of those who have multitasking ability decreases significantly. This is what we often say "indecisiveness" and can't concentrate.
As a result, nothing can be done well.
We thought that we could handle a few things at the same time.
But neuroscientist suggests that when we feel like we're doing two things at the same time, one of the neural circuits is just temporarily interrupted and opens up another neural circuit that gives us an illusion.
To improve your work efficiency, you don't have to be multitasking, but do it with better skills.
So don't play with your phone while you're driving, don't watch TV while you are reading. When your boyfriend is busy, do not complain about why he ignored you, because he really can't get to you.
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Know how to solve problems alone
You must be brave enough to face the problem and then know how to solve it. If you can't solve any problem, and you say you a better person, no one will believe it.
So when you encounter problems, do not run away from it, think about what method can help you solve it.
There are many ways to solve problems, collaborate with people, consult experts, or face them alone. However, the first two options are generally considered in the absence of any other law.
Before using these two options, it is better for you to try to solve the problem alone first.
For example, if you are a person who lacks self-confidence, how do you solve this problem?
First, you need to find out why you are not confident and understand the content of the problem. Is it your family's repression make you lack self-confidence or lack of ability to make you lack confident?
When you understand your problem, you need to find the key point of the problem.
If it's family repression, you need to realize how these repressions affect you, do you agree with them, and if not, how do you build the right self-awareness?
If you are not confident because of lack of ability, what kind of ability should you cultivate and what problem should you solve?
With these analyses, you can build a strategy to solve problems and think about what you can do to develop these abilities.
Finally, in the process of solving these problems, you always have to monitor the progress of the problem. Once there is a hindrance, you need to be able to adjust your strategy. If this method does not work, then change another method.
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Dare to deal with conflict
A better person will never run from conflict. Instead, they dare to deal with conflict and know how to deal with it.
The definition of conflict in psychology is that interpersonal conflict occurs when an individual's motives, goals, beliefs, opinions, or actions hinder others.
Conflicts arise from differences. How to solve this difference is an important factor in dealing with conflicts.
There are generally five ways to handle conflicts:
1. Avoid
Avoidance is not an escape, but a temporary cold treatment, so that each other can avoid further intensification of the conflict. When you feel that a persistent quarrel does not solve the problem, the appropriate cold treatment may make things a good solution.
2. Accommodation
Put your needs together, first meet the needs of each other, to maintain the harmonious relationship between the two sides. Proper humility can reduce most conflicts.
3.Force
With a strong attitude to force the other side to compromise, through your external conditions, such as physical fitness, social status, money to affect the other side, to achieve the effect of not fighting and bending the soldiers. But if the other side has a greater advantage than you, your toughness may be counterproductive.
4. Compromise
Each side takes a step back, sacrifice their own part to solve the problem.
5. Synergy
Negotiate with each other to find a win-win solution, so that both sides can achieve maximum benefits.
These five methods are common ways to handle conflicts.
When you encounter a conflict, weigh the current situation, choose which method is better, and you will be able to resolve conflicts to the maximum.
Of course, to do this, the most important one is the ability to execute.
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Execute
Even if you learn all the ways, if you don’t take execution, that doesn't make you any better.
How do you improve your execution?
There is no specific method for this, but it is related to your thoughts and attitudes.
As long as you can adjust your thoughts and maintain a positive attitude, you will be able to improve your execution.
It's useless to think too much, act first.
If you lack of confidence before you act, then no matter how useful the methods are, it is useless on you.
On the contrary, in the course of this action, you will accumulate a lot of experiences, these things can make your psychological quality slowly become stronger.
Of course, you can’t rush all these steps, you need to do it step-by-step, start from the small things, slowly, you will finally step up to improve your execution.
After you act, the rest is just perseverance.
